Monthly Archives: June 2016

Smooth

Standard

You mean that song by Santana and Rob Thomas?

 

 

Working through resistance in the beginning to make thing’s smoother in the long run.

Getting out of the bind’s.

Winding down.

Less need for time.

Can’t give up right before i finished  what I started. Hold on just a little bit longer.

Only faith can tell me what’s up and what will be done next.

Needs before expectation’s.

In touch with all the sensation’s.

I’m not alive if I succumb to the numbness.

On to the next transition.

thing’s haven’t been so smooth.

But the train is coming.

Smoothly take me to my next destination.

Smooth

 

Childhood

Standard

Childhood comes and goes yet it also shapes and leads into our adult lives.

Mixed with a lot of fun and good time’s we wish we can have back yet time’s occur that are not so spick and span that leave’s us never wanting to look back.

As we grow older we will always need our parent’s even if we do not show it. Do not forget your inner child who needs you.

Childhood is where we play and chase the sun down. That’s when the time was much slower.

your friend’s we’re usually always free to come join and there were no plans to be made.

The petty thing’s were the only thing that mattered and now the petty thing’s do not need to matter so much.

When I was a child i remember  counting the years until my freedom. Which was around this time in my life. I realized  My Inner child  always wanted freedom that im still striving for today.

What did your inner child want that you are or not living up to today? What are you depriving your inner child having?

Please do not let your inner child down.

Childhood

 

Sky

Standard

I used to look up into the Sky and pray to God. I sat by window looked up into the Sky and prayed that he would save one of my best friend’s mother from Breast Cancer, my Uncle from Pancreatic Cancer and another one of my best friend’s dad from Skin Cancer. Unfortunately none of them are here with us today. Through these death’s and disease the whole foundation  of my life started to crumble and my outlook changed to. I’ll never forget these people because while i was praying for them to be saved something through all of it was saving me. I started to understand a greater sense of connection that happens around us all the time that is impossible to get a sense of with a closed heart and mind. These people I am grateful for. I have gained the wisdom that is not death that we should be afraid of but regret. Regret can keep us from reaching the sky. Shutting down when something bad occurs instead of trying to learn the lesson can take the sky away from us.

Because of them I want to help other’s become more comfortable with themselves so they can more open an authentic. These people helped me pave a new road and foundation for other’s to live a life without regret. I decided to put my pride aside and I am refusing to be the person who feeds into cancer awareness. I do not want to play that game where i feed into the problem and join with other’s in grief im going to take it down with the solution. I am going to take thing’s a step further and lead people into self awareness and restored faith. Reverse and restore.Sky

Purpose

Standard

Let’s see what we can find when we search purpose on the internet. Well, looks like I found article’s with definition’s on the subject purpose, Justin Bieber’s album, and an activist organization. Interesting how all the outrage this day in age for a while now.. has not only been about finding your “purpose”, it’s also been about activism and Justin Beiber for a really long time now. For a hot minute I used to think I had to be some sort special person to make a difference in this world. Find my purpose, get into activism…be a “somebody”. Fight the fight!  From one rude awakening to next one seeming never ending issue to the other. Do we have to do bunch special things first in order to have Peace on this planet second? If so…why? Are we always just going to be finding something wrong? Do we even have clarity, distinction, and our priorities straight on these issues? What happen’s then the problems are solved? It just become’s a phase we went through. Even worse we can use these issue’s as a distraction.

I have my own perspective about activism.  Do not get wrong Im not saying we should not be doing anything about anything…but we also need to be honest with where we are at and where thing’s are making an effect and where they are not. Even if it might be at the expense of offending someone. I heard someone say something I love…“There is a difference between what is right and what is real.” Teal Swan  to me that make’s a lot a sense.   Which i noticed in a lot of activist group they we’re portraying themselves as right but they we’re not willing to be real. Im not saying whatever cause they are fighting for is wrong what im saying is  the way we are going about it is not the best because they can conclude that they are right.  I think activating on a subject come’s with emotional maturity not self righteousness. Not only that I firmly believe that we can not always bring up the past to clarify our case in the now. To simply put it things are getting messy and let’s not create more grief quicker then we are trying to solve it and let’s not move out of fear. Reflecting has helped me find purpose …seeing the meaning behind supposedly meaningless event’s

You are living your purpose every minute just the way you are and where you. Everyone’s Purpose on this planet is to learn something, learn, grow and stretch your soul. You do not need to find yourself you need to remember who you are. To me purpose means showing up not showing off! That’s how i see as a way to make yourself significant to others.  From activist groups how can I live my life with purpose always being right and getting into the hype…It was not possible for me it some it seems like an OCD issue. What about the problem’s that are right in front of our face’s that we can barely fix ? Some things do not need a carried out act of rebellion to prove a point or help.This is my very own perspective and rant and im sure I could write more about it because it can be a topic in and of it’s self so maybe I leave that for a further day.

Now what the hell does Justin Beiber have any purpose in all this. I’m sure if I tried I could figure out…But what do mean and Love yourself is def about of the purpose equation. Thank  for the reminder Justin!Purpose

 

Angry

Standard

I spent the last few years getting in touch with a lot of anger…you’d be surprised the amount that can rise when you give yourself space to be present with all your emotions. I do not like the way society looks upon anger…like it is such a bad thing. Delving into anger can be a very transcendental outlet for growth. We know we are feeling angry but when not conscious with it the worst thing about anger is we usually not have clarity on why we are angry or what we are angry about. Anger or any emotions is not something to just be expressed it is also an emotion that needs to be unraveled and cleared from our systems. Suppressed anger not only affect”s your health but also your abundance.

I was experiencing upper back pain. It felt like density on my shoulder’s and though i still have back pain…once I started consciously clearing anger and getting in touch a lot of uncomfortable pain started to dissipate. No one can say they are not angry when we still live in a world with a lot of opposition existing in this world at all different angle’s  in the year 2016. The upper back pain to me symbolized the responsibility of other’s that I was taking on and they are refusing to do. That is why diving into anger can be great…we start to give back the aches and responsibilities that are not our’s and we figure what our boundaries are. We are still living under a dream where if we just become a hero, help, do the work for other’s we will look like great people…and if enough people hurt themselves for other’s one day this planet will be saved.  But what i realized is doing that also has it down falls because it leads to a lot of  suppressed, regret, hostility and, tension between people. It’s the pleasure and pain duality.

Have you ever felt like you’ve been bending over backwards trying to help other’s and getting no where yourself?

I was that person until i was so stressed and woke up and learned to give the responsibility back. I was that person until I learned I was doing favor’s for other’s and sometimes the best thing you can do for someone is to do no favor’s for them at all. Until I learned we are still living under very old ways of surviving. I was in a hustle but I was not thriving. I also had to learn to love myself at my absolute worst so I didn’t think i had to act,think or do in a certain way in order to get something after. I had to learn that expecting other’s to reciprocate because I chose to do something, was the wrong perspective. Guess what happened while I was getting real with myself…I got so much hate and anger from people who came off so charming but those people we’re me. So I woke up from my dream of  being the hero/victim and layed it a side, so the real me can live. Me doing that thrashed my old relationships but if im honest they we’re never that great to begin with but left them with a space to grow into something new if it happens. Anger supported me in raising my standards. By me raising my standards i feel like im raising the bar for the rest of the planet.  Anger is never justified by attack…but if you are kind with your anger it will be kind with you if  allow it. Sometime’s I used to think I was angry at other people…but I was really angry at myself without even knowing it and this something that most people do not realize that create’s depression. I didn’t know what I didn’t know…that I could have not learned about myself if I was not willing to see through my own anger. Let’s not try to deny our anger but let’s find way to exult it to it highest anf best. Angry